Upside: I know they're watching so I study more.
Downfall: I forget they're watching and... ok here's the story
Someone sent out an e mail by BBC.com in fact, it was this in all entirety:
A survey of more than 1,000 men in India has concluded that condoms made according to international sizes are too large for a majority of Indian men.
The study found that more than half of the men measured had penises that were shorter than international standards for condoms.
It has led to a call for condoms of mixed sizes to be made more widely available in India.
The two-year study was carried out by the Indian Council of Medical Research.
Over 1,200 volunteers from the length and breadth of the country had their penises measured precisely, down to the last millimetre.
The scientists even checked their sample was representative of India as a whole in terms of class, religion and urban and rural dwellers.
It's not size, it's what you do with it that matters
The conclusion of all this scientific endeavour is that about 60% of Indian men have penises which are between three and five centimetres shorter than international standards used in condom manufacture.
Doctor Chander Puri, a specialist in reproductive health at the Indian Council of Medical Research, told the BBC there was an obvious need in India for custom-made condoms, as most of those currently on sale are too large.
The issue is serious because about one in every five times a condom is used in India it either falls off or tears, an extremely high failure rate.
And the country already has the highest number of HIV infections of any nation.
'Not a problem'
Mr Puri said that since Indians would be embarrassed about going to a chemist to ask for smaller condoms there should be vending machines dispensing different sizes all around the country.
"Smaller condoms are on sale in India. But there is a lack of awareness that different sizes are available. There is anxiety talking about the issue. And normally one feels shy to go to a chemist's shop and ask for a smaller size condom."
But Indian men need not be concerned about measuring up internationally according to Sunil Mehra, the former editor of the Indian version of the men's magazine Maxim.
"It's not size, it's what you do with it that matters," he said.
"From our population, the evidence is Indians are doing pretty well.
"With apologies to the poet Alexander Pope, you could say, for inches and centimetres, let fools contend."
HAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Anyway, I found it so humorous that I read it aloud to my roommate and our other psuedo-roomie (finals = massive sleepovers). We all had a little laugh, and somehow the topic came up about whether a man with a big penis brags or not.
My cute little roommate is a virgin. Pseudo and I on the other hand... are NOT. Roomie tells us about how a certain annoying cocky guy in our class brags about how arabs have the largest penii (pleural for penis?) - at which psuedo and I had another nice laugh.
We explained to her that men with large penii do not brag, they know. They know they've got a massive penis. They know and don't need to compensate with words. Pseudo and I both described to her the all knowing "look" these men give people when it's brought up. One of those "shut up before I take you out and club you in the head with it" looks. Or one of those "just wait until later" looks -- oooo those are the hottest ones... :)
SORRY! - island fever is hitting me
Anyway, we start talking about exes - and in my situation I have luckily had very well endowed boyfriends. The only person that bragged was CPE, and he was the smallest of the bunch... though he was a large "average".
I am talking about this when I suddenly remember --
SHIT!!! MY FATHER WAS JUST SITTING BEHIND THE COMPUTER 20 MINUTES AGO!!!
SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT
Mid conversation I suddenly go silent with this horrified expression on my face.
Shit.
I get the roomie's attention and point to the camera, her and psuedo get these HORRIFIED expression on their faces.
Shit.
So I quietly click on the minimized skype button expecting to see my father having a heart attack.
...
Thankfully he wasn't there.
THANK GOD THANK GOD THANK GOD!!!
I was also happy to report that his skype was on idle, which meant he hadn't been around since the last time he checked on me.
...
anyway, there's the downside - and my exciting story of the day.
(thank god)
back to studying - daddy's watching.
p.s. I got the 9th highest grade on my path lab final.
5 more exams until home.
[
9 comments:
You were worried why...? Because your father has a small penis?
Disgusting.
I can't decide what's funnier... the small penises or the skype incident.
My dad used to be really strict with me when I was living in Toronto. He used to want to web cam with me a lot just to check that I'm living properly. I used to find that annoying, but now I think back and find it endearing. It's nice to hear that your dad's like that too.
Those guys that brag... do they really not know that they're less than average?
Ashamed of your father's penis? That's where you CAME from... Wow, that's horrible even for me.
I hate to inject this into your collective fantasy, but most men are generally ignorant of the penises of other men. Men don't take the urinal next to other men. You have a third-variable problem. Men who brag about their penis probably also brag about whatever else they have to brag about.
I tend to disagree with galactichero. Depending on your culture, you may know more or less. My school from 6th grade on made all of us take community showers after every gym class. At the time between 11 and 14 this can be fairly tramatic. As some guys all of the sudden have man parts while others have boy parts. Either way, after the first couple of showers, everybody pretty much knows where they fall in the spectrum of things.
Editing... editing. This is my effort to play nice.
I will say this, however: If your dick stopped growing when you were 14, Bub, I pity you.
I'm biting my tongue not to speak right now.
err... type
Post a Comment